• Courts in Venezuela are now sentencing people convicted of murder, rape, drug dealing, child and sex trafficking, violent armed robbery to life… in the United States.

• Life in Minnesota must be hard. What else could explain why a 60 year old man would look like he was 75?

• Little did the creators of Gollum know that their character would turn out to be a dead ringer for James Carville.

• Biden says climate deniers are “brain-dead”. Huh, didn’t realize he was a denier.

• Kamala Harris repeated “I was raised in a middle class family” 42 times when her teleprompter failed.

• Rule No. 1 when competing in a debate; Never refer to yourself as a knucklehead.

• As usual, fact checkers were busy after the debate. In one example it was determined that Governor Wals statement that “Trump hadn’t paid taxes in the last 15 years” was false. Checkers determined that the statement would be true if “Trump” were replaced with “Hunter Biden.”

• The suicide rate for a specific demographic has suddenly increased dramatically. People that previously subscribed to the Hillary tetralogy just heard that the fourth book is soon to be out.

• Oprah Winfrey is cleaning house. Anyone who had anything to do with scheduling the Kamala interview is now looking for work.

• Fishing Weekly is replaying the Trump-Harris debate on their TV program non-stop. Never has a Big Fish taken the bait so much in such a short period of time.

• Kamala Harris has successfully reigned in her obnoxious cackle. Now she shows obnoxious facial expressions instead.

• Putin says Kamala Harris has “such an expressive and contagious laugh.” Now he has this constant and irrepressible urge to giggle like a school girl.

• Kamala says her values have not changed, but her accents sure have!

• The Second Gentleman is now being touted as a sex symbol. Yikes!! If he’s now the male standard for the human race, we need birth control more than ever.

• Kamala Harris’ political beliefs were formed over the last 40 years of her life. It’s only taken 40 days for her to reverse all of them.

• With JFK’s endorsement of Trump he needs additional security. TO PROTECT HIM FROM HIS FAMILY!

• Are you feeling depressed? Have you lost your appetite? Do you find yourself looking for a high bridge? Isn’t the feeling of JOY wonderful?

• Kamala wants to do debates like Jean-Pierre does press briefings. READ THE ANSWERS FROM A BINDER!! And; if a question doesn’t fit any answers in the binder, just read something, maybe no one will notice.