• After the Trump verdict, the Biden campaign is urging the president to use the term “convicted felon” as much as possible. With that in mind, here are some excerpts from a recent presser:

Reporter: Mr. President, what do you take away from the Trump trial? Biden: Convicted felon.
Reporter: Mr. President, what do you think will be the outcome of your son’s trial? Biden: Convicted felon.
Reporter: Mr. President, what do you think will be your fate if Donald Trump wins the election? Biden: Convicted felon.

• When do the words “shred” and “overwhelming” mean the same thing? When Democrats claim there is nary “a shred of evidence”.

• If the Hunter Biden defense wants a guaranteed acquittal they should import the 12 jurors from the New York Trump trial.

• Now that Robert De Niro has become part of the Biden campaign can Barbara Streisand and Bette Midler be far behind?

• After the Trump verdict, LaGuardia Airport and LAX were inundated with takeoffs. Fortune 500 Company CEOs and CFOs were getting out of Dodge as fast as their private jets could take them.

• Do you like multiple choice exams? Do you like solving brain teasers? Do you like fill-in-the-blanks? If yes, then you are eligible to be a juror in Manhattan.

• It could be argued that increased muggings in America are good for the economy. Afterall, the muggers spend the money, don’t they?

• The new Bobbsey Twins – Joe Biden and Robert De Niro.

• So now anything that falls from the sky (such as a helicopter) is said to have had a “hard landing”.

• Heeeeerrres Carnac! Carnac predicts the answer to the question in the envelope is; No more than five. And the question is (opening the sealed envelope); How many people gather and wave at the president’s motorcade as it passes by? (What else are you going to do as you wait for the “Walk” sign?)

• In the most recent ceasefire negotiations Hamas is insisting that Gaza be made the 51st state. Biden is considering it.

• Clint Biden says he wants Trump to make his day by debating him, although with a ton of caveats. The only caveat he didn’t spell out was a requirement to tell the truth.

• It’s over for the prosecution! Stormy Daniels under oath testifies that she’s a virgin.

• Be forewarned that facial recognition technology can now accurately predict if you are a Democrat or a Republican. Lisa Murkowski, Susan Collins, and Mitt Romney have introduced a bill outlawing the technology.

• Hunter says he’s been defamed by Fox News because they published “intimate” images of him. Would it be unfair to say that this claim undoubtedly sends the meaning of intimate back to the stone ages?

• Biden finally came out and made a statement about the campus chaos; “Don’t”.

• If the 24/7 coverage of the campus protests continues, Latitia James and Fani Willis will have to join in if they want to get their faces back on TV.

• The pro-Hamas encampment at UCLA has set a Guinness World Record for the most rapid creation of a toxic waste dump.