• Dunders and Blunders offers to buy the Panama Canal for $50 – the present-value of the amount that Jimmy Carter sold it for plus an extra $20 for a tip.

• Congress needs to pass the Lame-Duck Act which would limit presidential acts after a lost election to:

o Pardoning Thanksgiving Day turkeys (not including humans),
o Flipping the switch to turn on the National Christmas Tree,
o Smiling for the presidential Christmas card,
o Toasting guests at the White House Christmas Party (off a teleprompter, of course),
o Directing the moving van when it arrives at the White House.

• So far Trump’s resistors have memed Musk as first lady, vice-president, and even the president. What’s next; head of the Department of Government Efficiency?

• What’s that whirring sound in Washington DC? Drones? No, it’s paper shredders!

• If you believe the White House spokesperson, homeowners everywhere will now have to build on to their garages so they will have room to park their “hobby” drones.

• There is a new way for political figures (and their spawn) to plead guilty in America. Receive a pardon from the president even though there are no charges, indictments or convictions.

• The man is declaring war! Vladimir Putin? No, Gavin Newsom.

• Oh oh! Hunter’s pardon has been invalidated. Joe was not of sound mind when he signed it.

• Would a “devout” Catholic, the likes of Joe Biden, be excluded from the Notre Dame Cathedral reopening ceremony? Can’t be! His invite must have gotten lost in the mail.

• Biden has issued another questionable pardon; Commander.

• Biden will be issuing a general pardon for all 3 million federal employees under his administration covering each individual’s period of employment, except for the period of January 20, 2017 to January 20, 2021, just in case.

• If all the Democrats who said they would “leave the country if Trump gets elected” actually leave, Democrats will never win another election.

• Trump has sent a letter to Liz Cheney and Adam Kinzinger informing them that will not be considered for any positions in his administration.

• Barack Obama has an army of people feverishly searching the Web and deleting any information linking him to Kamala Harris or her campaign.

• The DC Fire Department had to respond to an alarm at the White House. Turned out Joe Biden’s legacy was on fire.

• LAX was extremely busy today. There were long lines of celebrities and Hollywood types who vowed to leave the country if Trump won the election.