• So here’s the latest word salad from Kamala while she was in the Philippines. “We must follow international rules and norms because if we aren’t following the rules and norms then we are in violation of the rules and norms that require us to follow the rules and norms. If we want to change the rules and norms then we must follow the rules and norms that tell us how to change the rules and norms. If we change the rules and norms than we must be careful because now the rules and norms are different than the rules and norms before the rules and norms were changed. Have a nice day!”

• Usually at the annual White House “Turkey Pardon” ceremony there are two turkeys present. This year there were three!

• The Taliban and Hamas have a new terrorist disinformation governance board. It’s called The View.

• Biden signs a pardon for two Thanksgiving turkeys named Chocolate and Chip, but on close examination it was discovered that the names on the actual document had been secretly changed to Hunter and James.

• Biden just turned 80! Attorney General Garland has appointed a special counsel to investigate Trump’s involvement.

• In Pennsylvania early voting started as much as 50 days before the election. The state likes the concept so much that they have decided to implement “early taxation”. From now on taxes will be withheld 50 days before the money is earned.

• Fifty more illegals were dropped off in front of the VP residence. Kamala decided to be hospitable and offered to make them breakfast. Only problem is she couldn’t figure out how to open the egg carton.

• John Fetterman’s parents are moving to Washington DC so that John can continue living in their basement.

• BOMBSHELL! Florida flips! Democrats just found 1,508,315 votes for Charlie Crist. Crist wins the Florida gubernatorial election by one vote.

• Nancy is putting down the gavel and rumor has it that it is at Paulie’s urging. It seems he has developed an irrational fear of anyone who has a hammer in their hand.

• Joe (or is it Kamala?) beware! John Fetterman, Stacy Abrams, and Beto O’Rourke are all thinking about running for president in 2024.

• John Fetterman has plans to start a new clothes line. The company’s tag line will be “Clothes that I wear at Democrat rallies that are also suitable for cleaning the garage, doing yard chores, or changing the oil in your car.”

• Here’s a trend many of us can probably get behind. Elan Musk’s takeover of Twitter has caused Whoopi Goldberg, Gigi Hadid and Kathy Griffin to drop or lose their accounts.

• In the past couple weeks there has been a dramatic drop in porn viewership on the internet. Well, of course! Bill Clinton has been out on the campaign trail!

• So where has Michelle Obama been during this campaign season? Has she been hanging out at their $25 million retreat in Hawaii; their $15 million ocean front compound on Martha’s Vineyard; or their $10 million house in Washington with the brick wall around it? Do you suppose it could be all three with a few $10,000 a week rentals in between?